Recently, I took Olivia with me to do a little jean shopping for me. Yes, for me. Now that I have two children in school, I am starting to make my way back into shopping at real stores with parking lots instead of online with a mouse. One child is much easier to manage in a dressing room than all three - trust me. I tried it once. Four of us in a small space with a huge mirror gave other shoppers something to talk about, and I just ended up with a big headache and no clothes.
I think one of God's finest miracles takes place when you can find the perfect pair of jeans that makes you look great. A pair that hides everything that a baby does to your body, a pair that you can breathe in, a pair that you can dress up or down, a pair that doesn't make you look like a mom, (or a plumber) a pair that can withstand tugging, bending, playing, criss-cross applesauce, stains, getting in and out of a mini-van gracefully, and the list goes on. The first store Olivia and I went into had an entire wall devoted to jeans. Frankly, it was overwhelming. Sometimes when Charles and I go shopping, he'll say - Go ahead and look for some jeans. Aren't you about due for a new pair of jeans? We have a few minutes. Minutes? Oh, no, Charles - this could go well into the night. There is the shade - faded, washed out, dark wash, holes, no holes, and then there is the cut - straight, boot cut, flare, roomy, skinny, low waist, mid-rise, slender panel. It's crazy. And then once you figure out the cut, then you have to see if you can match the color you want, with the perfect shade, and the size. If you can find exactly all the requirements in your size - Jackpot! If you come out of the dressing room with a smile on, you can be sure you've touched heaven. And then you pray that you like them at home as much you liked them in the circus mirror and under the best store lighting. I knew I was in trouble when Olivia pipes up and says, Mirror, mirror on the wall, please let mommy like her jeans.
Sometimes finding the right way to pray, or finding the right prayer, is a lot like finding the right pair of jeans. It has to "fit" you. If the way you have been praying doesn't feel right anymore, and is starting to feel a little worn out, then it is time to start searching for a better "fit". Maybe the prayer book you've been using just isn't cutting it anymore, and you find yourself starting to hunger for something new to try. Just like jeans, one size does not fit all, and you might have to do a little shopping to find just what you need. There are as many ways to pray as there are jeans, and this too, can get overwhelming. Maybe you've been praying with scripture for awhile and now you're looking for something that you've never tried. The choices on how to pray to God are immense. If you are a person who loves art, and loves creating, you might try painting what you feel in your heart, and then asking God to tell you what it reflects about your inner self. If you have a favorite author, you might try someone else's words and thoughts on God. Go to a book store that has a variety of prayer resources, and just start browsing. Take the time to read the intro, and then sit down with it if you can and read a couple of the devotions or prayers. You'll be able to "try it on for size" and see if it moves you, or speaks to you.
Maybe you want to learn a new prayer technique. See what books are available on the subject and then give it a try for a couple of weeks, and see how that "fits" in with what you are needing. Dialoguing with God is another great way to pray. You write your name first in your journal and simply pour your heart out to God. Then write God: And let God respond to what you have written. Try not to think about it too hard, just write what comes to mind. This can be a rich source of inspiration, and it is fascinating to go back and read about your conversations with God after a lot of time has passed. Praying the psalms is a wonderful source of comfort, courage, and strength. Every emotion can be found in the psalms, and sometimes just sitting and praying with one line from a psalm is very nourishing to the spirit. Give writing your own prayers a try. Sometimes writing down your needs, your feelings, and your desires in your own words, and in your unique style, is the perfect way to pray. Sometimes there are no words needed. Simply "listening' to God in Silence is satisfying. Devotionals are a wonderful way to help you focus, and remember that God is present to you always. If you're tired of the same woman/mom devotions, you might try using a children's devotional. There is something about their simple messages and their point of view that can be very moving and inspiring to adults. Praying with a mantra can be very powerful. One word, or a few words, can make all the difference in having your spiritual needs fulfilled. If you need the grace of acceptance, choose a line or a phrase that speaks to you of acceptance, and simply repeat that. And sometimes going to the prayers you grew up with is the perfect "fit". The Lord's Prayer covers everything about our lives that we are, and could need. Slowly, and prayerfully, pray one line of it, or pray the entire prayer thoughtfully. One of these lines could be your mantra, or you might use your gift of sketching or painting, and express that prayer through color and texture. I love doing a blessing walk. After a workout, I like cooling down, with a few laps around the gym. As I am walking, I bless myself, others, and pray in gratitude for all the blessings God has bestowed on me. It is a great way to end a workout, and on a tough day, I am reminded how wonderful I really have it.
The ways in which we pray are as varied as the number of jeans there are to choose from. And just like that perfect pair of jeans, the prayers we pray have to "fit" what we're feeling, experiencing, as well as our hopes and dreams. If one way to pray doesn't "fit", "try on" another way to pray. When our bodies change, we shop for a different pair of jeans to make us feel comfortable and content again, and as our spirit grows and evolves, the ways in which we pray sometimes have to change in order for us to feel comfortable and content again in our relationship with God. The method you use to pray doesn't really matter. What matters is that your prayers come from your heart, in the most sincere and genuine form possible. There is no "right way" to pray a prayer. One word is as much a prayer as an entire psalm. You can tell if the prayers you are praying are making a difference if you are more accepting of others, if you are more forgiving and compassionate, and if you are gaining more insight into who you are as a person loved by God. And if you feel a desire to be of service whenever possible, then the way you are praying is the "perfect fit".
